It’s been almost three years since I have chosen to leave my love life in the hands of God, but let me tell you I find myself surrendering that area of my life more than often. It gets hard being happy for other people and their relationships when you may be wondering when is it going to happen for you. I come from a church that speaks a lot to married couples, mothers, fathers and families. I’m not in either of those seasons right now and it’s easy to feel lonely being around couples all the time.
But I’ll also tell you this, I’m thankful for my single season because God has strengthened me so much. I’m far stronger than I was three years ago. Don’t get me wrong. I still have my moments, but I don’t fall as easily. I go to God the moment I feel weak–to be honest sometimes the moment after.
In my waiting I have asked God to help me express the love I want to give to my future someone to the people that I already have in my life, so I can get it out of my system. I want to give that love to my friends and family… and even to strangers (with wisdom of course). Everyday is a struggle to show love to my friends and family. But I realize if it is a struggle now, it’s gonna be a struggle when God does bring that person into my life. I need God to help me love and to teach me how to love more than I already do.
I have also learned that it is not wise to want to rush out of one’s season into the next because God has his reasons for doing things the way he does them. I need to learn how to put my trust in God and my faith in God and not in man. Man will hurt you, disappoint you, or even reject you. This does not exclude one’s own husband because husbands are not perfect. But if you have a stable foundation in God, none of those things will stop you from moving forward. I’ve been hearing and feeling, a lot lately, that I need to wait on the Lord. I had a little fit not too long ago because of it. I chose to sulk in my impatience and made myself look like a brat instead of just putting my feelings to the side and waiting on the Lord like I was told to do. It was a lesson learned, I’ll tell you that much, and God is faithful! He knows our hearts’ desires and our longings. I do believe that there are reasons why we have to wait on things. He knows best..
Learning to trust in the Lord is not a 1..2..3.. thing especially in this area of our lives, but will you take the leap of faith with me?
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.